Monday, March 3, 2008

I typically wouldn't do this...

... but it was too good! (Thanks Vicki for sending it to me!)

Edited 3/4... I had to make the picture smaller... It was freaking me out :o)




(A PAID POLITICAL ANNOUNCEMENT BY SEN. BARACK OBAMA (D- ILL) and I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE... )


My fellow Identity-Americans:

As your future President I want to thank my supporters, for their ... well, support.

Your mindless support of me, despite my complete lack of any legislative achievement,
my pastor's relations with Louis Farrakhan and Libyan dictator Moammar Quadafi, or my
blatantly leftist voting record while I present myself as some sort of bi-partisan agent of change.

I also like how my supporters claim my youthful drug use and criminal behavior somehow
qualifies me for the Presidency after 8 years of claiming Bush's youthful drinking disqualifies
him. Your hypocrisy is a beacon of hope shining over a sea of political posing.

I would also like to thank the Kennedys for coming out in support of me. There's a lot of
glamour behind the Kennedy name, even though JFK started the Vietnam War, his brother
Robert illegally wiretapped Martin Luther King, Jr. and Teddy killed a female employee he was
having an extra-marital affair with who was pregnant with his child. And I'm not going anywhere near the cousins, both literally and figuratively.

And I'd like to thank Oprah Winfrey for her support. Her love of meaningless empty platitudes
will be the force that propels me to the White House.

Americans should vote for me, not because of my lack of experience or achievement, but because I make people feel good. Voting for me causes some white folk to feel relieved of their imagined,
racist guilt. I say things that sound meaningful, but don't really mean anything because Americans are tired of things having meaning. If things have meaning, then that means you have to think about them. Americans are tired of thinking. It's time to shut down the brain, and open up the heart.

So when you go to vote in the primaries, remember don't think, just do... And do it for me.

Thank You,
Barack

6 comments:

Scott, Teresa and Gabby said...

That is hilarious! Scott and I both think it's pretty good.

Teresa

Gramma Carol said...

Hahaha! Ain't it the truth! I could have added a few more things but this is sufficient!

Jon & Jen said...

I'm going to try and politely disagree, although I'm sure anything I say will be disregarded because of your assumption that all Obama supporters are mindless liberal freaks.

That being said, I'm a big fan of his liberal voting record. Maybe he could actually get us out of a war that we have long overstayed. (Gasp) Well, that would be just awful - wouldn't it?

Oh, and the Vietnam War, by the way, was not Kennedy's doing. It started in 1959, which was smack in the middle of Eisenhower's presidency... thank you very much for that one Republicans.

Furthermore, I don't think Obama's "youthful drug use" qualifies him to be president anymore than Bush's youthful drug use qualified him. But all things being equal, if it didn't disqualify Bush, then it shouldn't disqualify Obama.

Lastly, it would be a nice change of pace to have a president who is actually articulate. Even if he just says things that "sound meaningful," that'd still be better than having the whole world think our commander in chief is an idiot. At least Barack doesn't have a dozen books written about all the stupid stuff he's said...

Okay, sorry for the lengthy response. I guess that's the most politely I could disagree. Don't 'cha just love politics...

Seriously, though, it was all meant to be in good fun. Hope you're doing well!

~The White family~ said...

That was GREAT!

Devin and Chelsey said...

HAHAHAHA, that is toooo funny! (-:
Thanks for sharing!

~The White family~ said...

Yeah, I am glad you made his picture smaller! I get scared just lookin' at him!